The last three days of school have certainly been a 2nd degree riot worth articulating about. This is gonna be a long entry, brace yourselves.
Saturday, the 9th of April
The field trip last weekend was glorious fun. We actually went over to the Ministry of Defence, not the MOE. Either way, the trip was wicked cool. It was all such a bore at first; we started off looking at posters, with polite interest, explaining with intricate detail how our crap reaches the ocean from our toilet bowl. That and feigning interest with a 3D replica of mud. (Well, it was actually more like a 3D replica of the ground and what’s beneath; I think it was supposed to demonstrate how rainwater and animal faeces get anywhere.) Okay, so nobody really wants to learn about sewage and cesspools now, do we?
After half an hour of looking at semi-captivating articles on drainage systems and model houses, we headed out back of the MOD building, where, guess what, people were fly-foxing and abseiling and rock climbing! It was so wicked. Everyone else and I got on the flying fox (we were about 3 floors high) and it really wicked. I’ve never been on the flying fox, like ever, ever, ever in my entire life, and I most certainly didn’t expect that to change that morning. It was a massive shame though, that the flying fox wasn’t that high, the higher, the more thrilling it is.
Oh, and some douche got stuck on the flying fox; dude was dangling about 150 metres off the ground for more or less 15 minutes, lucky bastard. Ha-ha. I think his pulley got stuck when he jumped off the edge (didn’t he get a nasty wedgie?) and had to hang up there, several feet off the ground for ages. Good for him. Wish I got stuck up there; must’ve been so wicked cool. Definitely a Sony Moment of the Day, according to Matt.
The equipment for abseiling and fly-foxing (is that even the right term, fly-foxing?) was a little chafing though. It’s like this underwear sort of gear thing you put like shorts where they hook the line onto you and stuff. I mean on girls it looks perfectly fine but on the boys? It rather emphasizes their... unmentionables. [shudders] SO ANYWAY...
I went abseiling too! In fact, I was the first in line to abseil. Took me ages to set up cause I kept whacking my head by accident on the thousands of beams in the flying fox building thingy but the abseiling dudes-in-charge were really nice and tried not cause my premature death, thanks so much!
Dude: Okay, you’re good now, just jump off the edge.
Chels: What? Just jump off it?
Dude: Yeah, just go, jump!
Chels: What? No way! I’m freaked out now. What if the line breaks? What if I slip? What if I fall on that poor guy down below?
Dude: Relax, you’ll be fine. Now go! [pushes Chels off]
Chels: HOLY GODDDDDDDDD!!!!
*
Chels: Oh hey, this isn’t half bad... hey, I can see the mall from here!
*
[after being lowered about 4 feet]
Dude: Let go off the rope!
Chels: WHAT?
Dude: Let go, take your hands off the rope!
Chels: WHAT?? Let go of the rope, are you kidding me?!
Dude: Let go!
Chels: [lets go]
Dude: Well, do you feel safe?
Chels: Hmmm... Let’s see, I’m hanging about 250 metres of the ground and could plunge to my death down below any second now should this rope break. Yeap, definitely safe, uh-huh, no doubt at all, safe, safe, safe dangling here, yup! I’m fine, no worries!
*
Chels: Someone had better be taking a photo of this! I don’t do this abseiling business everyday! [stomach growls] I’m hungry. Abseiling makes you hungry. I want food. GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!
The abseiling was brilliant. Richelle went after me and Branden bought us some burgers from KFC right after. (THANKS BRANDEN, YOU’RE AWESOME. SINGAPORE ISN’T SINKING.) Boy, abseiling makes me hungry.
“Yeah, that was really cool, just imagine if—Chelsea, are you talking to your food again?”
–Richelle
I... have this weird habit of talking to my food before I eat it. Don’t look at me like I’m a loony, I’m sure something’s wrong with you too. Ha-ha-ha.
So after kind-of-lunch, we hung out at this cool (not literally, the sun was pretty angry at me or something that day, I was burning in the heat... that would explain my sudden change in skin color) garden thing outside the MOD building while waiting for the rest of the tenth years to finish off fly-foxing slash abseiling slash rock climbing.
And then we were confined inside the huge bus. It was cold inside, can’t complain. After everyone else came around, we set off back to school. It was wicked. It’s not like you get to do all these really cool rides everyday right? Maybe if we be good kids, we’ll get to go sky diving, parasailing and bungee jumping next. Keep your fingers crossed for that one, you lot. Indeedy-do, it was a gloriously wicked school day.
Monday, the 11th of April
Nothing too substantial. Oh wait, except for the road accident involving my brother’s 12-year-old bestfriend and his mom. And a series of unfortunate events within the Chemistry lab.
So my bro’s bestfriend, Lee, and his mom were crossing the road from Supa Save and like yeah. A second too early, a second too late, and we all know what happens. There were police and an ambulance and all the red ‘no crossing’ tape hitched everywhere and Izaq said there was blood on the road.
Cataclysmic disaster. Now before you guys freak out and launch into a full-length speech about how to safely cross a road with over speeding cars without causing a accidentally ending up in a hospital morgue, let me just tell you that... Lee’s only got a fractured shoulder and I think his mom’s doing fine so point of 60-word sentence: nobody’s gonna die.
Goodness, I can just imagine the school paying someone to dress up as Barney and give the elementary kids a talk about crossing the road.
Barney: Okay kids, now remember, look both ways before you cross and make sure have an adult with you. Okay kids?
Kids: Yes, Barney!
Barney: [turns into a banana] YAY, now let’s go do the peanut butter jelly time dance! IT’S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME, PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME! WAIYEA WAIYEA WAIYEA!! [insert rest of lyrics here]
Yeah. Bizarre. SO ANYWAY...
Our class had Chemistry practicals at 3:30 in the afternoon which meant 3 solid hours of hanging out at Mamih, talking about a lot of things in particular, cramming some last-minute Chemistry notes on cations and anions into my head and constantly bursting into laughter at Mickko & Izaq’s anecdotes while simultaneously getting lost in the maelstrom of thoughts inside my own head. FUN.
After hours of whiling the time away, I came to learn one thing about the service at Mamih. You know how it’s really, really irksome how the waiters never show up unless you call them? Everytime I go there for lunch after school, they never come around unless you call them. And sometimes, when you call them, they won’t even show any signs of hearing you.
We’re not in New York and this is not some street where you frantically call out for a cab and they ignore you. The service can be so terrible, my mates and I actually had to bring the dishes someone I don’t even know ate off of back into the kitchen for them because NO ONE bothered showing up to clear our table. What the hell?
So anyway... back to my point. They never show up when you need em to. They show up when you don’t need them to! Since no one bothered to come clear up the plates on our table after we ate, we moved to another table. And guess what? The bloody waiter shows up. Makes you want to go, “HELLO? WE’RE DONE! WE WERE RIGHT THERE? AND YOU NEVER SHOWED UP? WE HAD TO GET THE DIRTY DISHES TO THE KITCHEN OURSELVES?” Geez Louise. And don’t even get me started about the food! I found weevils in my fried rice. Appalling.
BUT ANYWAY... we got back to school and I made it to the practicals 5 minutes late. We were to have a practical test and we had to mix all these chemicals to produce such pretty, pretty colors, figure out which cation’s which and try not to flunk the whole thing single-handedly.
The coolest part was when I accidentally poured some unknown chemical into an open wound on my middle finger. It was quite funny now that I think of it.
Chels: OW HOLY GOD, OWWWWW. SHIT, I GOT SOME CHEMICAL INTO MY WOUND! IT BURNS! Ohcrapohcrapohcrap, it’s turning purple! Holy God, is this normal?
Izaq: That’s not normal.
Chels: AAAARRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
*
Izaq: Don’t worry too much. They’re probably just gonna amputate your middle finger.
Rafi: It’s just one finger riiight?
Chels: JUST ONE FINGER? I need this finger! How am I supposed to play guitar? I haven’t even learned piano yet! How am I supposed to react when someone pisses me off and my middle finger is non-existant! Okay, maybe I can use my other middle finger, but that’s not the point! I can’t lose this finger!
Izaq: And it’s not too bad. It’s just gonna swell and turn purple and spread to the rest of your body and cause your premature death.
Chels: You’re. Not. Helping.
I totally freaked out on the spot. My finger was burning and it really was turning purple! So I did the first thing that came to mind. Suck the poison slash chemical out. Whaaaaat? I saw Samuel Jackson do it on this poor kid who got bitten by snake in Snakes On a Plane so you can’t argue. So I shoved my chemically contaminated finger in my mouth, sucked as hard as I could and spat it back out into the chemically contaminated sink.
Seeing as I’m still alive, foam isn’t gushing out of my mouth and my middle finger is intact and hasn’t mutated yet, it must have worked. Not that it really saved me. I mean what if it was just saltwater? (Epic fail.) But hey, this proves I know what to do when infected with toxic substances, yay, someone award me a prize, I’m wicked. I feel like I should be on Lost or something.
Anyway.
There were many more epic failures after that performed by a few other douche nozzles in class. Rafi threw away my chemical concoction we were supposed to be saving for the discussion. Qawi smashed about a couple or so testubes. And so did Matt. And Koh. And a few others. Geez. If scientists are so smart, why can’t they make up some sort of unbreakable test tube, for goodness sake? It should be fireproof, smashproof, foolproof, Izaqproof, the works!
So the practicals ended with many a disaster, but twas fun all the same.
Tuesday, the 12th of April
School was great today, I’d give it a... 8 out of 10. And the reason behind it getting 8 out of 10 isn’t even related to school. I can’t mention it here for all the world to see but heck, I’m certain you’ll catch me gazing off into space with a goofy smile plastered on my face when I think of it.
We had an English test, a lesson on Ionic Bonding, a lecture on our delinquent behaviour in between classes (the amount of racket and noise emitted by our class tends to reach up to 500 decibels when triggered and I must say it hasn’t impressed teachers in the least bit), a discussion on the latest Biology test (scored a B+, not bad), another lecture on Ionic Bonding (which I daresay, rather intriguing) and an hour with a teacher who really can go on forever talking about things, just on and on and on and on and on, you wanna out a sock, no, two socks in her mouth!
And we were given these souvenirs for taking part in the National Day affairs. Guess what we got?
[souvenirs are being handed out]
Chels: I’m starving...
Richelle: Me too.
Chels: Remember when they used to give out food during National Day practice?
Richelle: Yeah. Ahhhh...
Chels: Free food everyday, oh wow. Oh hey, what’s the souvenir? [opens box] I bet it’s a clock... it’s a......... plate. A PLATE? Oh goodness, the irony of it all! I ask for food and I get a plate... with no food!
Nope, not a clock. Nor food vouchers. No, not even food, itself. We were given... plates. BLOODY ORNAMENTAL PLATES, I TELL YOU. Ages and ages of playing hide and seek with the angry sun for two months and burning in the unbearable heat resulting in several fainting spells and severe alteration of skin tone and all we get for reparation is a bloody plate we can’t even eat on! Hello, maintenance? I think the world’s broken. Yes, again. [sigh] It’s not MY fault! What do you mean it can’t be fixed?! It HAS to be fixed! Are you kidding me? Oh bloody hell.
Thank you government, I’ve always wanted a plate. A plate I’m not allowed to eat on. Yeap, haven’t got enough of these at home, no sir.
Labels: goofin' off, people, quotes, rants, school, things that piss me off
-Anonymous
Yeah, I really wish it were asexual. No, asexual and sexually aroused. Even if it were asexual it wouldn’t find the need to do itself without being sexually aroused. Why am I even talking about this?
Oh right, that’s why.
Anyway, I’ve given up on my non-asexual homework, I’ll figure out a way to finish em tomorrow.
So I got sent out of class for doodling instead of writing down notes during Commerce yesterday. I’ve never been sent out of class for doodling before. Actually, I’ve never been sent out for unfinished work before. Like, ever. I was just doodling for goodness sake! I was gonna copy the notes down later, my textbook’s not going anywhere!
So anyway, I’ve decided that I am dropping Commerce. I’ve been getting pit-low grades for it and frankly, I find the teacher’s teaching and marking methods uncool. Seriously, you don’t even want to know what I think of his class. I’m doing so badly in it, it’s pretty safe to say that Commerce is my downfall; I actually got higher in BM than in Commerce last term. See how bad the situation is?
And I am moving, moving, moving away to some other elective. Commerce is not my calling, no sir. I’m seeing the admin first thing tomorrow morning to ask for a transfer. I’ve even thought up a decent, rational explanation as to why I’m dropping it. I mean I can’t just march up the front office demanding a transfer with my actual reason for moving:
“I’m getting insanely low marks and besides, in Computer, they get to watch movies and stuff for entertainment—I mean, educational purposes! And besides, I know shitloads about computers; no doubt, I spend practically my whole time on them at home! Commerce just isn’t my calling and frankly, I find the teacher sucky, he loathes me anyway and I don’t see why I should continue wasting my time on it. So can you move me to Computer now? They’re starting on how to use Flash next week and I really don’t wanna miss that.”
Yeah. Well, knowing me and my mouth, I probably will say that anyway. Goodnight world, have a great weekend tomorrow.
P.S. Elaine and Camille are back for a visit. I’ve missed them like nuts. We’re going out tomorrow I think. And we might be having a pool party over at Rona’s. Oh yeah, pool party, can’t wait. Cheers you lot.
Title courtesy of Mickko Acosta.
Well not as much half an hour ago. I managed to clear away most of the papery debris that’s managed to conquer my table and my bed’s not that big of a mess anymore. Okay, so it still is. It’s gonna end up messy anyway when I go crash on it later. I managed to get some of my clothes off of the bed. More like, relocated them. So now clothes carelessly drape upon my many, many chairs.
If it’s not a wasteland, you can probably call it a Dumpster. My very own Dumpster. Yay. There are still empty junk food packets lying around (there’s dark chocolate 7 inches to my left, I don’t even like dark chocolate, what’s it doing here?), there are a couple of fruits slowly going rancid on my dresser and I think there’s a city of mould alive and thriving on what used to be a chocolate muffin right in front of me. And there’s a... a brown smudge on my table. What. Is. That?
Oh well, apart from the dust which refuses to be blown away and the steadily increasing number of food that is biodegrading in here, my room’s not so bad. At least I can still breathe. As long as I can still breathe, I’ll be fine. Trust me. [subliminal message here]
Anyway, it’s been seven days since my last entry. Needless to say, I’ve been caught in a landslide of surreal events. I’m serious. But here I am now to entertain you. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?
School’s been... exhausting. I feel so drained out nowadays. Last Thursday, I was a walking zombie in school. Slept through the whole day, missed every single one of my lessons especially my two most favorite periods: P.E. and BM. I was half dead; I walked straight into a glass window two seconds after assuring someone I was perfectly fine. It was probably due to the emotional trauma that came over me the night before but I’m not going to talk about that now. Nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy. Fall Out Boy.
On the other hand, school’s been better than most days. After playing dead last week, I’m starting to find delight in school again. Just yesterday, I’ve had the best Chemistry lesson so far. (“Chemistry is my favorite subject now. We can talk about boobs in peace,” says Izaq. One word: silicon.) We talked about elements and how some elements are all miserable and krap because the other elements are whole and complete and stuff like that. You’ll get my drift if you’re done with Year 10.
I’ll just put it this way. Some elements have complete atoms and some don’t. And the way my Chem teacher deduced it was so... relatable. “These elements are sad and miserable; they’re incomplete all they want to be whole and happy just like these elements over here.” I was like... “WHAT THE CRAP. You poor elements, I know how you feel.” But I really think I’ve lost my mind.
I can frigging relate to ELECTRONS AND ELEMENTS NOW. Who does that?!
I mean, relating to The Notebook, Bruce Almighty and Definitely, Maybe is perfectly normal. Relating to songs by Mayday Parade is perfectly normal. Relating to movies and songs are perfectly normal. Being able to relate to ATOMS AND ELECTRONS is NOT perfectly normal.
Oh, insanity just seems to be a little too fond of me. You can quote me.
But put all that aside, what I learnt in Chemistry yesterday was that sometimes to be whole, you’ve got to kick out a little instead of taking in more than you can. Of course, Chemistry-wise, it’s a little hard to explain here but I can totally relate to this... sometimes you just gotta kick out a little instead of trying to take in more, which is pretty much harder. Kick out a little, and you’ll be whole, Chelsea [cue cheesy inspirational music]. Whoa, whoever knew Chemistry can lead to a much needed life lesson/epiphany/another reason to think I’ve lost my mind? Either this all makes perfect sense to you or I really am insane.
So it’s been a really long day, I think I’ll leave it up to here for tonight. PE tomorrow. Yay. I get to show off my lousy football skills. No really, I am lousy. I’m rubbish at football, singing, BM, finishing work on time, and keeping my sanity in check. Goodnight world.
** Andy Hurley’s Fall Out Boy’s drummer. He’s a clean freak and is as anal as Kiks is. But his drumming skills are godlike. Believe you me.
Apologies for the lack of new entries to entertain you for almost a fortnight, of course. What else would I be apologizing for anyway?
The reason for my two week absence is not of course because I’ve changed my mind about FaceBook and created myself an account, having just spent almost fourteen days poking someone and flooding another’s Wall instead of writing something for here, goodness no.
Speaking of FaceBook, Mina showed me this hilarious video rant about FaceBook. This goes out to all those who’ve incessantly treated me like dirt for not having a FaceBook account.*coughMarloKikoIzaqcough*
Ha-ha. Eat scum FaceBookers!
As to why I haven’t posted in a while... well, I’ve come to the conclusion that whenever something worth writing about happens to me, there’s always a 40-60% chance of me actually writing about it, especially when that ‘remotely interesting thing to write about’ thing happens to me in simultaneous succession within a span of only two weeks.
In lesser and simpler sounding words... I’ve been so freaking busy, I make New Yorkers seem relaxed and easy-going!
And in case you don’t know... we’re on a ten day break from school. Like that helps! This so called ‘holiday’ is not even a holiday, not to me, no sir, uh-uh! It’s just like a regular school day, minus the ‘school’ bit! See, the maid’s gone on a little holiday of her own and guess who gets the housework dumped all over her? Sigh.
Term One of school was so freaking hectic, I was so relieved for the ten-day break, but apparently and inconsequently, my plans aren’t just to eat, sleep, repeat at all. It’s freaking eat, do the dishes, get on laptop, cook the food, eat the food, do the dishes, get the laundry done, hang the laundry, dump the garbage, get self back upstairs, get on laptop, stay up till 3 to make up for lost time on laptop, sleep until noon, repeat!! That plus countless little things in between as well! Call this a holiday? My bottom. Oh, what I wouldn’t give for simple old eat, sleep, repeat.
In more or less four days, I’d be back at school, most undoubtedly finding myself buried in an alarmingly large mound of schoolwork by the end of each day. Another sigh. I haven’t even started on my holiday homework yet... who gives homework on a holiday anyway? WHO? Obviously, teachers at my school and yours do. One more sigh and a groan.
And guess what, I haven’t even gotten over the holiday lag from the two-month break last year. And that was LAST YEAR. Heaven’s angels. And Term One has been heller busy; shall I emphasize that for you? HELLER BUSY.
January, I was suffering from holiday jetlag after two-months of wicked fun weekends, sleepovers and parties. My brain refused to kick-start yet, so I said, okay, I’ll give it some time, I’ll focus next month, it’s only the first month right?
Come the second month, followed by National Day practice every-freaking-school-day, rehearsals for that TV show, the best weekend at KB, choir practice and auditions. Not to mention piles and piles of homework and tests here and there and practicals. AND THEY SAID THE 10TH YEAR WAS HONEYMOON YEAR. MY ARSE!
And so I said, okay, second month, there’s still the third month till assessment, I’ll focus then. March carried along with it more choir practice, the choir competition , TV show rehearsals, shootings and recital rehearsals and recital nights itself.
And don’t even get me started about the state of emotional trauma I’ve been in for the last three months!!
My heart and mind have been on a freaking rollercoaster ride, I think my soul might actually throw up its insides. (You can’t say I’m full of myself now.)
I can honestly say that I am pooped. I’m pretty much surprised (and relieved) that I haven’t gone insane due to all the pressure and emotional issues going on. Oh, the human heart and mind can only handle so much...
So you can only imagine how thankful I was for the grace of term break. Only to be ruined by the maid’s absence and the endless tasks now expected of me like uh, doing the laundry or sorting the garbage or ironing the clothes. I’m pretty surprised I’ve not been asked to paint the walls or rectify the plumbing.
Okay, let’s not talk about housework. I’ve had enough as it is. Mom will be home in half an hour and I’m willing to bet my newly bought—wait I haven’t bought anything in ages. One last sigh fellas. Never mind, she’ll be home in a bit and will probably drag me down to the kitchen to gut fish again or something.
So I’ll wrap this up and come up with another entry going over the last ten days, ‘cause believe me... enough has happened to last me a few months in solitude. Well given the current state of things, I think I will welcome a few months in peaceful, calm and school-free solitude. Ah, bliss.