That has got to be the greatest comeback, ever. (Except maybe for “Am I boverred though?” courtesy of Lauren Cooper from that ridiculously hilarious (and vulgar) British TV show, the Catherine Tate Show, I’ve used it tons of times before and it managed to shut everyone up) Ever since watching Friends, for the first time in my entire life last Tuesday, I’ve been using that line on everyone who tries to take the mickey out of me.


“That’s not true.”
“Yes, it is.”
“Not.”“Whatever dude, you kissed a guy.”
“What? NO.”
“Heck yeah, you did.”
“Did not!”
“Did so!”
“Did not!!”
“That’s what you always say!”
“I did not! I DIDN’T OKAY?”
“…Whatever dude, you kissed a guy.”
“…”


Ultimate pwnage. The ones on the receiving ends also attempt to use it against me, and since has it been sacrilegious for a girl to kiss a guy?


“Hah! You kissed a guy!”
“…And?”
“Dammit.”


Note to boys: the line “Whatever dude, you kissed a guy” will NOT affect a girl in whatsoever way. Just thought you should know as some douchebag up there tried it on me. *coughIzaqcough*

There are also times when they can backfire. Oh yes, believe me, it can. I was chatting with this guy one night and we start arguing and I used the line against him.


“Heck no.”
“Seriously.”
“Okay… whatever dude, you kissed a guy!”
“…and so what if I have?”
“HOLY HELL, YOU KISSED A GUY?!?!?”
“What? It’s the most effective way of annoying someone of your own sex.”
“…”


Note to self: Always make sure that boys on the receiving end of “Whatever dude, you kissed a guy” retaliating line are completely, 100% and without a doubt straight. Guess he pwned me. Goodness. What is the world coming to?

But anyway, is Friends the best thing ever or what? I cannot believe I have not seen this stuff ever till like, last week. Have I been living under a rock or something for the past decade and a half?

Labels: F.R.I.E.N.D.S., people, qoutes, TV shows

Oh, cheesecake. Mmmm.


I’ve got an updated recipe for fun: put the lot of us band kids within a 10-mile radius of each other with cheesecake, Coke, Ruffles and oh, Coke. Always works. Just like tonight, it was beyond fun. Beyond. Fun. Awarding Ceremony right? And all us band people, well most of us, and of course, our circle of buddies, the ones I’ve grown mighty close to throughout the whole concert/rehearsals thing were there. Except of course, Nina & Shannon. You guys just missed another truckload of memories.

It was so fun! Aneesah, why’d you have to leave so early? We just starting to have fun you know, with the Coke and Devil Child and Ruffles. Haha. Someone was smart enough to provide us with Ruffles. Not to mention ridiculously sour Lays. So it was Sour Cream & Vinegar flavoured. Still. It tasted funny. But that only adds to the fun fun fun. Chyeah.

I came about 15 minutes late (it was raining cats and dogs, wow, never thought I would ever use that expression, and the road off my house was flooded like mad) and I arrived just in the nick of time, again, never thought I’d have to use that phrase, to hear my name called out. It was like: *enters mini hall* *sits down* *name gets called* *gets up* *sits down again*. And 10 minutes later the whole certificate thingy was over and we were entertained by these mightily talented kid drummers. Distinctions, they got, for the Rockschool exam last month. Three cheers. Whoo.

And quarter of an hour later, refreshments were served. Cheesecake, Coke, Ruffles, Lays and some weird lime green carbonate drink. And that’s when all the fun began. Heck yeah. I’ll put down the quotes later, it’ll be easier to get the gist of the moments that way.

Ah good times. And don’t forget the Devil Child. She was sitting right next to me the whole time and was being mild mannered. When most of everyone’s left, that’s when she became incredibly hyper and started doing the most ridiculous things. To me, especially. She would attempt to bite my wrists off, she’d cling on to my leg like super glue, she’d do a whole lot of other things which I cannot mention here lest other 7 year olds decide to follow suit. I was grateful enough that she did not spit tuna sandwich on me again like at the Amphitheatre weeks ago. Yeah, I guess someone thought it a funny joke to serve tuna again.

Oh, and she, well her name isn’t really Devil Child, it’s like, Amalie or something, well, she just won’t sit still. She’d either be running around, jumping up and down or gnawing someone’s hands off. It’s like a rule; Devil Child must not sit down. Ever. And if she does try to stand still, she’d fall down. I am not exaggerating. Ask anyone! The kid. Haha. But she is cute. Oh dear, I’ve grown attached.

Besides the fun with the kid, the photo taking was super; we were caught in awkward poses, thus resulting in ‘wrong’ shots. Oh and Chuan & I had this eating competition on who could eat the most slices of cheesecake. And guess who won? Duh. Me. Hahaha. I sorta just stuffed all the cheesecake into my mouth. I must’ve looked ridiculous yet again. But hey, now I’ve got a food reputation. Yay me.

Although, I did lose the carbonated drinks competition with Idrous after that. We filled up these plastic cups with Coke, of course, and found out who could finish the lot first. And he won. Well, as the great Bart Simpson once said, “You win some, you lose some.” But as Thornapple from The Born Loser once said too, “You can’t lose em all.” I’m gonna get you for this Idrous! Bring on the Coke. (That’s a funny phrase.)

So Joak asked me how much I weighed and Idrous was convinced he could carry me. And he did. Cinderella style. It wasn’t so bad. Until he started semi-throwing me into the air and catching me and then he spun so fast, it felt like one of those insane spinning rides you find at amusement parks. When he finally put me down, the room and everyone else in it wouldn’t stay in focus. What a ride. Everyone thought it amusing, teacher Mark was screaming for more =.=

Hahahaha. Good times eh? Honestly. These guys never get old. Everyone just goes crazy whenever we see each other, even though the last time we were together would be less than three days. Haylie almost cried. Again.

Oh God, I love these guys! Amazing people. And guess what? We’re going out this weekend to watch Twilight, Ells, hope you don’t mind that I bring I few awesome, awesome people. Can’t wait for Saturday.


So here are a few quotes from tonight:


Chels: (to Chuan) Hey Calvin.
Chuan: I’m not Calvin!
Chels: Gee, I’m sorry; you guys have names that are almost the same!


***


Idrous brings tuna sandwich from the refreshment table.

Chels: Thanks. *opens sandwich to reveal the spread, tuna*

Chels: AAAARRGHH! TUNA! What kind of a sick joke is this?! *goes paranoid, looks for the Devil Child* It’s the whole tuna sandwich thing all over again!


***


Chels goes to the refreshment table.

Idrous: Why don’t you take some of the cheesecake?
Chels: *in shock* THERE’S CHEESECAKE?
Idrous: Yeah! *points to cheesecake tray*
Chels: CHEESECAKE. *grabs at least 6 slices* No one told me there was cheesecake! *grabs more*
Idrous: Chels.


***


Chels walks back to the gang with cheesecake.

Chels: Guys, there’s cheesecake!

Everyone rushes off to the refreshment table. (Ah, the effect of cheesecake.)


***


Chels sits next to Amalie, plays with her.

Chuan: Hey Chels, isn’t that the Devil Child?
Chels: Well yeah, but she’s nice now.

Amalie bites at Chels.

Chels: See?


***


Chels: (to Calvin) Hey Chuan!

Chuan turns.

Chels: Oh no wait! I’m sorry, gosh; you guys are just so alike!


***


Joak, Chuan, Calvin, Neesah, Haylie and Chels pose for a photo.

Teacher Honey: Where’s Aaron Ho?
Chels: Aaron ho?????


***


Haylie, Calvin, Chuan, Neesah, Chels & Joey talk about random things. Aaron Ho passes by.

Joey: Bye Pokémon!

Aaron Ho turns around and corners Chuan.

Aaron: What did you call me?!
Chuan: *cringes* It wasn’t me!!!

Joey runs away, behind the wall laughing his arse off. Everyone else laughs as Aaron continues to manhandle Chuan.


***


Aaron: I’ve had that since I was little!

Aaron Ho walks away.

Chels: Why did you call him Pokemon again?
Joey: Oh, cause his email is Pokemon231.

Everyone bursts out in laughter.


***


Teacher Mark has the camera. Haylie, Neesah, Joey, Chels, Chuan and Calvin pose.

T. Mark: One, two, three—*coughs*.
Everyone: *Groan*
T. Mark: Alright, again. One, two, three! *5 seconds pass* Do you press this button?
Everyone: *Groans again.*
T. Mark: Alright, one more time. One, two, three! Oh, no lights! *phone goes on standby*
Everyone: *GROOAAAN.*

Teacher Mike comes and takes the photo.

Haylie: Finally. Someone who knows how to use a phone!


***


Joey: (to Chuan) Hey Calvin.
Chels: You mean Chuan.
Joey: No, I mean Calvin. I’m talking to him *looks to Chuan*
Chels: That’s Chuan.
Chuan: Why do keep mixing us up?! We don’t even look alike!
Chels: Well, you don’t. Actually you do, a bit. You have the same eyebrows. The same eyes. Oh and your nose is the same as his.

Chuan looks at Calvin.

Chuan: NO!!!


***


Idrous: *grabs bottle of weird lime green carbonate drink* This is mine now. *walks away with the bottle*


***


Amalie aka the Devil Child grabs Chels’ arm and tries to bite it.

Chels: Hey! If you come near me again, my bodyguard’s gonna get ya.
Amalie: *cracks her tiny knuckles*
Joey: *stands next to Chels* Yeah. *snaps fingers*
Haylie: Chyeah.
Amalie: *freaked out* *stares at us*
Chels: Okay it’s all good, she’s freaked out now.


***


Aaron A sits alone. Chels walks up to Aaron A.

Chels: Well SOMEONE’S being antisocial.


***


Chels & Aneesah pose for a photo. Neesah is all ready.

Teacher Honey: *about to take photo*
Chels: Oh crap, is there tuna in my teeth?


***


Everyone laughs about something. Chels spills Coke on the floor.

Chels: Aneesah, your nose!!!

(Recall the scene a few rehearsals back where Coke came spattering out of Neesah’s nose)


***


Amalie hits Chels’ butt. Amalie runs off laughing like a maniac.

(Repeat this scene at least five times)

***

Chels: Okay, whose idea was it to give the Devil Child Coke?


***


Teacher Honey and Chels talk about Acoustic Night.

Haylie: Acoustic Night! *starts sobbing*


***


Chels has to leave.

Haylie: Wait! *hugs Chels tight*
Chels: Gee, I’ll still see you on Saturday. *yet, hugs back*



And those are just the ones that CAN be quoted down. The rest? I’m not good enough at recapturing. It was fuggen’ comical or even more so. I guess you can exactly comprehend how funny it is to us. It’s a band thing. Well, g’nite fellas. I’ll see you on Saturday. Somebody bring cheesecake, I think Chuan wants a rematch.

Labels: band, good times, Neo, qoutes

Chels: Dude! Guess what I wrote for number 4d, Section C? I didn’t know the answer.
Qawi: What? What did you write?
Chels: I was like, “Refer to Form 3 Textbook.”
Qawi: Chels, that’s a stupid answer. You should’ve written “Google it yourself.” That would’ve been smarter.

Yeah. I know. Well hey! They didn’t want you to leave any blanks so I thought “Refer to Form 3 textbook” would’ve been a sensible answer if you didn’t know the actual answer. I’m clever, live with it. Haha, so it’s either the checker’d get ticked off my smart answer or they’d get impressed and give me plus marks. Chyeah, as if. Hey, it could happen, know.

But I agree with Qawi. “Google it yourself” would be the smartest answer! >< I’ve been waiting for the chance to give off that answer, glad it’s here.

Lucky fellas though, the people who sit for IRK instead of Commerce. Their exams ended today & the holiday begins for them. Dude, you shoulda seen them, all happy and such when the invigilators announce the end of the exam.

Invigilator: Those whose exams end today, all the best & happy holidays!
IRK students: YEAHHH! [grins & smirks]
Invigilator: Those who’re sitting for Commerce, I’ll see YOU tomorrow.
Commerce students: [grooooaaaaannnnnnnn]

It won’t be long now *evil, sinister, maniac laugh*. Today was fun! All the goofy douchey conversations us kids get into. Here are some conversations today:


[Aikks needs to photocopy commerce notes, it’s half past 5, most teachers’ve gone home]

Aikks: Are there still any people in the front office?
Chels: Um like, Uncle Kenneth?
Aikks: Yeah.

[Uncle Kenneth is right behind Aikks, goes into his car]

Chels: Well, he’s getting into his car now.
Aikks: NOOO! I NEED TO PHOTOCOPY SOMETHING!!
Chels: Well you better hurry, he just shut the door.
Aikks: NOO! [digs into her bag for the papers]
Chels: He’s putting in the key.
Aikks: [still frantically digging, screaming hysterically]
Chels: He’s turned on the ignition.
Aikks: NO! [in hysterics, still searching]

[His car leaves the parking lot]

Chels: He just left.

X

[Aikks & Chels arguing about who gets to keep commerce notes]

Chels: I need it too!
Aikks: Well, you’re smarter than me!
Chels: Aha! I’ll take that as a confession!

X

[Chels, Aikks walking to Supa Save, sees a stake]

Chels: Hey look, you can use that to kill a vampire.
Aikks: I was gonna say that!
Chels: Oh well.
Aikks: You can only partially kill them with a stake though; you have to use a lemon wedge.
Chels: A lemon what?

X

[Mickko does this incredibly hilarious dance while performing a song by Jet]

Chels: You guys performing that for prom?
Mickko: Maybe. Barry wants me to.
Chels: Oh! Feature me then!
Mickko: Alright! *puts on one of those boxer match announcer voices*
Mickko: Give it up for Barry’s band!! *discreetly & quickly* Plus Chelsea.

X

[Justin walks towards Isaac]

Isaac: Look! It’s a Pokémon!

X

[Sticks, Isaac, Janno & Kiko all talk about nonsensical yet hilarious garbage]

Aikks: I’m with a bunch of retards.
Chels: Oh, I feel your agony.


X

Mickko: You know what they say, I'm the fisherman, not the bait!
Chels: Right.
Isaac: Yeah, and Chelsea killed all the fish.

X

Mickko: Do you think Janno’s dangerous?
Chels: Not at all.
Janno: See?
Mickko: *incredulously* What?!
Chels: He’s as dangerous as a rabbit.
Janno: What?!

X

[still talking about how not dangerous Janno is]

Chels: He’s as dangerous as a box of kittens.
Mickko: Werewolves. WEREWOLVES.

X

[STILL talking about it]

Jemuel: He’s as dangerous as a tree!
Chels: Trees are dangerous, my friend.
Jemuel: Only if you run straight into them!



Good times eh? Good times, I love my mates. I mean, the scenes up there might not have been funny, but hell, they were at the time! I cannot wait for tomorrow, last exam! And then, and then, and then we’re gonna go straight to the mall, celebrate. Oh yeah, guys, don’t forget your timetables!

So, I leave you with photos:


Qawi, myself and Aikks. Good for him, exams are over & done with.


Nickks, Aikks & I.


Me, Afif & Aikks. He’s leaving! I’m gonna miss this dude! Here we go again: everyone leaving x/


Aikks & I.



This crazy bastard mixed two Pepsis together. And drank them. Not that he’ll explode or anything.

Later that night:

[sound of distant explosion]

Chels: Did you guys hear that? Must be Isaac’s stomach. His guts are probably flying halfway across the country right now. Oh well. Don’t say we didn’t warn him.



Well! That is what happens when you mix Mentos and a Coke.


Mmmm...Pepsi.

Mmhmm. Well, gotta run now, need some last minute studying for Commerce.

*Spongebob voice* I’m ready! I’m ready! I’m ready!

Labels: exams, hilarious, photographs, qoutes, school