I found someone I thought never exists. Someone who has NOT heard of Twilight EVER.

I think Shannon Shannon’s been living under a rock for the past three months. Either that or she’s been locked in a cellar with no human contact her entire life until today. Here’s the conversation that followed after I told her we’d go watch Twilight on Saturday on MSN:


Shannon: ...What’s Twilight about anyway?
Chels: HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW?! YOU MUST BE THE ONLY GIRL IN HISTORY WHO DOESN’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT TWILIGHT!!!
Shannon: Not really...my mom doesn’t know about it.
Chels: What?! This has got to be like the awesomest vampire movie ever!
Shannon: Wait, wait! I know what Twilight means! “The soft glowing light from the sky when the sun is below the horizon caused by reflection of the Sun’s rays from the atmosphere”. Or “periods of state of obscurity or gradual decline.”
Chels: Were you living under a rock for the past 3 months?
Shannon: Vampire = scary. NO WAY. I’M GONNA WATCH BOLT.
Chels: It’s not like that. Edward’s like the hottest vampire out there.
Shannon: How can you say that? Vampires are scary. Chels, wait till he bites your neck and blood comes out.
Chels: I don’t mind. Ahhhhh Edward.....Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.
Shannon: And Quarantine! Rabies! No Chelsea, I’m begging you.
Chels: Vampires do NOT have rabies.
Shannon: Don’t look him in the eye! Edward has rabies.
Chels: Has not.
Shannon: What’s the opposite of has not?
Chels: Um, has so?
Shannon: Has so!
Chels: Has not!
Shannon: Has so!
Chels: HAS NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT times infinity!
Shannon: YES YES YES YES YES YES!
Chels: You lose. Read the book girl! Google it!
Shannon: Has so x infinity x 100. HAH. I didn’t lose. I’m just a slow typer. Who makes lots of typos.
Chels: HAS NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT infinity to the power of infinity!
Shannon: HAS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. There’s no such thing as infinity to the power of infinity. If there is...then infinity to the power of infinity x infinity YES he has rabies!
Chels: Has so!
Shannon: HAHA! He has rabies. You said “has so”. I win. Chels you just admitted Edward has rabies.
Chels: There has so infinity times infinity! That’s what I meant you blonde!
Shannon: NOOO.
Chels: Did you know Christ was a Jew?
Shannon: No O.O You said so Edward has rabies. AND I AM NOT BLONDE. I have no blonde hair, I highlighted my hair brunette’s and I like the color!
Chels: Hmpff. Edward still has no rabies!
Shannon: Fine! Is this monkey cuter or is Chuan?


Yeah. That was random. At least I convinced her Edward has no rabies and never will have! Gee. It’s been a long day, convincing Shannon Edward Cullen has no rabies. I’m turning in for the night. Shannon, you’ll see on Saturday. HE HASN’T GOT RABIES.

Labels: hilarious, people, random, Twilight